Pregnant Chronicles #1: The Beginning

I’m 27 weeks today, the beginning of the last trimester of my pregnancy journey. And I intend to chronicle it starting this week – my thoughts, the invaluable lessons, and other pregnancy related issues. I would have done it earlier but I delayed it as a respect to my in-laws’ wish of not sharing anything about my pregnancy, except of course with my immediate family and closest friends. As a matter of fact, I share all my pregnancy woes/issues/stories with my family more than with my in-laws , which is normal. It’s something with the Bangladeshi culture where “pregnancy” is something to be a “hush-hush” and not something to be announced widely. This is to avoid any “bad wishers” or the "evil eye". They even consider it a minor illness, I remember one colleague, he never informed us that his wife is pregnant and by the time his wife was on labor and he has to take the leave, he just informed us that his wife is ill and in the hospital. Some Filipinos do the same thing too – just keeping the news within the family.

After two weeks of arriving here in Dhaka, I got pregnant. It’s something that we planned right after we got engaged because I’m not that young anymore and we want to start our family as soon as possible. It’s an answered prayer. Looking at the dates – I conceived on July 3^rd, a few days before that, I was sick and was on medication. I was hoping to be pregnant by then so I was disappointed when my monthly cycle started on the 3^rd. So right after the cycle, we double our efforts, followed some tips & tricks in the hope that we will get it this time. I have fears of “having difficulties in getting pregnant” and “running out of time”, which are why  we followed some tips/tricks, anyway, there’s no harm in doing so.

I started reading Rica’s blog when I found out she is pregnant. And because of what I’ve read in her blog, I was aware of the symptoms of early pregnancy which I slowly notice with my own body 1) tenderness of the breast, 2) changes in the body temperature which worries my Husband thinking I might fall sick again and 3) the implantation or seeding. Good thing I read this seeding in the blog, otherwise I would have think that my cycle started again, a week earlier. All through out, I was also in constant communication with my sister who was pregnant also at that time. By 1^st week of august, I want to take a home pregnancy test already because my suspicion was getting high – my sister advice me to wait for few more days. 

Come August 7^th, I can’t wait anymore so I decided to take the test – and I’m so happy when I saw the 2^nd line appear. It’s like a magic unfolding right in front of you. I was planning to tell the news to my husband the following day as my “anniversary surprise” to him, but he was inside our room waiting for me to come out from the bathroom so he saw the kit in my hand. There goes my advance gift to him. I informed my 2 sisters and mom about the positive results instantly, and the following day, we informed my in-laws. After my first check-up we found out I'm 6 weeks pregnant, I informed the rest of my family, and after another check up where I heard the baby’s heartbeat already, I informed my closest friends.

We were face with the next dilemma – finding a good OBGyne who will support my decision of having a “normal delivery” and not thru “caesarian section” which is the common practice here in Bangladesh. Majority of the child deliveries here are thru “CS” – for some reasons, it’s the choice by the majority of the locals here. We heard stories about 1) OB’s scaring the patient that they will have no choice but to choose CS over normal delivery, 2) the mother is not properly informed about the cons of CS, and they just want the easier way to give birth. Due to this unethical medical practice, I have my own doubts. At the back of my mind, the doctor is taking good care of me but at the same time not helping me much to have a normal delivery. I just felt a little bit at ease when two people I know gave birth recently thru normal delivery. I wish to see their OB but their clinic is far from where I live, so I have no choice but to go to the nearest reputable hospital which is the Apollo. I haven’t heard any good feedback regarding my present OB the same way that there’s no negative feedback about her also. So for now, I’m sticking with her. In general, OB’s here are distant and cold. They don’t really explained things to you unless you ask them. And it seems they don’t really build a “relationship” with their patients, unlike in the Philippines. I did inform my OB that I prefer normal delivery and her reply was she don’t force her patients to go for CS, if they think they can handle the labor pain then they can have normal delivery. Well, it’s good to know that the decision is mine; I just pray that she is helping me with this one.

Well, I did prepare myself before getting pregnant. As soon as I got engaged, I went to my sister’s OB to have myself vaccinated with MMR. I started drinking folic acid also a few months before I got married. These plus healthy married life and of course prayer helps us get pregnant.