Missing Bangladesh and the Festivities

Bangladesh may not be the best country to live in nor a place to tour, but it has its own charm, if only you open your eyes and mind, you will be enchanted by this small and young country too. What I miss most of Bangladesh aside from the friends and family I left there, is the winter season from late November to early March. It's a very pleasant weather. In the city, the temperature gets cold like Baguio City during the 80's, while in the hilly parts, it gets too cold that people die because of the cold temperature.

Early morning winter, it's getting denser.

And since it's winter there, it's also considered the "Wedding Month". One of H's cousin is set to get married this month. They already held their "holud" last wednesday and the wedding is today.

The engaged couple wears yellow or orange for the Holud 

Holud is one of the many festivities in connection of a wedding celebration. It's commonly practice in Muslim religion and Hindu religion, and it became a Bengali Tradition. Some Christians/Catholics adapts this celebration also, but I have yet to attend a Holud for a Christian or catholic couple.

Holud is a bangla word for turmeric and it's also the bangla word for color yellow. Traditionally, holud for the groom and for the bride is celebrated separately, but nowadays, people celebrate it together. It's similar to a bridal shower or to a stag party without the "hanky-panky" or "kinky games" or "naughty games". In Holud, the couple are usually dress in color yellow or orange traditional bengali clothes, and the family members’ clothes are also color coded, and the guests are expected to wear something yellow or orange too. The couple are seated on the stage where guests will have to scrub them with turmeric paste or spread the turmeric paste in any expose skin of the couple, and feed them with sweets afterwards. This practice is the “cleansing of the couple” before they enter the married life. If we look at it, it’s similar to the confession we do prior to the wedding celebration. We have to be clean before we face the Lord and the church community and accepts the Sacrament of matrimony.

Sometimes, they also prepare a program of dancing and singing.

Dance presentation during gaye holud of another cousin

In H's family, they don't practice this tradition, that's why we didn't have a Holud party, but if given a choice and chance, I want to experience the Bengali traditions also, but definitely, I will have a "Boubhat party".

My second time to wear a saree at my staff's holud party. (2008)

Tradition is a guide and not a jailer. - W. Somerset Maugham

Another thing that I will miss this winter season is the "mustard field" in bloom.

He don't bring me flowers anymore, but he made sure to give me a field of flowers.

Last winter, H and his family planned a trip to the village so that I can see and have a picture in the mustard field. This one was just a small patch of mustard field, but nevertheless, it was awesome. They say dark spirits lurk around the mustard field that's why they find it weird that I want to go and see and have a picture in the mustard field. 

Pre-Cana Seminar

Pre-Cana or Preparation for Marriage Counselling is a requirement in a Church wedding. Since H and I are based overseas, we requested from the Chancery of Cubao to allow us to have our pre-cana abroad.

Bibaho Prostuti Shohaika (Marriage Preparation Help)

Our pre-cana was administered by a seminarian. And there were times that the discussion was awkward since there were topics that are “taboo” in BD like the sexuality and family planning. We had a one hour session every night from 730pm to 830pm for 5 consecutive nights. It’s a good thing that it was Ramadan during that time, the roads going to the church were traffic free all the time, that it took us 30minutes from the house to the church, and 45minutes from the church to the house which usually takes 1 hour and more during regular days. We consider it our “date” too because we go out for coffee or snacks after the session before going home.

During the seminar, I’m so proud with H because he shared lots of things. He is a man of few words and he doesn’t talk about his emotions but during the seminar, he opened up and shared in the topic too. I want to share what we had discussed in the 5 nights seminar.

1^st session: the seminarian, Brother Ronald Costa, discussed what Marriage is. He asked H and me why we decided to get married and why we want to marry each other. Marriage is a covenant as God is present in it, and it is the first vocation. I can’t recall anymore our answers but H mentioned that he decided to marry me because he wants to spend the rest of his life with me already, he doesn’t want to wait for the weekend for us to see each other but he wants to see me before going to sleep and as soon as he wakes up.

We talked about the 7 Sacraments too and of course I memorized the 7 sacraments that’s why when I can’t complete the 7 sacraments, I made sure to Google it once I reach home. And of course, I’m correct, I already did mentioned the 7 sacraments but Brother Ronald made a mistake by telling me that Matrimony and Holy Orders are one.

Before we ended the 1^st session, he gave us an assignment. We have to write 5 Good Qualities and 5 Bad Qualities of each other and we will discuss it next session.

2^nd Session: We discussed first the 5 qualities. I was surprised I wasn’t able to write 5 bad qualities of H. He isn’t perfect but I can’t seem to find any bad qualities except the obvious hehe. And I was worried that he will be able to write 5 bad qualities of me. We didn’t discuss further with our good qualities, Brother Ronald just reminded us to continue with our good qualities. On the other hand, we discussed the bad qualities and what are the possible causes of it and if we can fix our bad qualities. And well, our bad qualities are fixable.

Brother Ronald shared to us the ingredients to a Happy Conjugal Life: faithfulness, respect to each other, full consent both intellect and will, accepting each other, belief in God and to each other, praising/appreciation of each other, open and constant communication, living according to our means (family budget), healthy sexual life, quality time for each other and forgiveness.

The 3^rd session was awkward since the discussion is about the reproductive system and sex. H didn’t share much during the discussion because he is uncomfortable with the topic. While me, I find it uncomfortable because I’m talking to a Bangladeshi. Yes, they are also advocates of Natural Planning and Brother Ronald reiterated that many times during the session. At the same time, he mentioned to us to be responsible parents and to cultivate a loving relationship with our spouse.

The 4^th session, we talked about family spiritual life. It’s not only the physical body that needs nourishment; our spirit/soul needs nourishment too. We need to pray, attend the mass regularly and do good. We have to balance our time, time for self, time for spouse, time for kids and time for others. We have to be the role model to our children and nourish them according to the teaching s of the Church.

The 5^th session was just a review of the whole session and giving of certificates.

The pre-cana class may not be the best session but nevertheless, it enlightened us about married life, our responsibilities to each other and to our family. H is now much aware that he really needs to be more supportive of me especially that I don’t have my family and friends in BD. He is my support and my beacon.

"I take you to be my Best Friend, my faithful Partner, and my one True Love. I promise to encourage you and inspire you and to love you truly through good times and bad. I will forever be there to laugh with you, to lift you up when you are down and to love you unconditionally through all of our adventures in life together." 

W@W Christmas Party 2012

The first thing I did after getting engaged was to join the Weddings At Work or W@W. It’s an e-group for engaged couples. I’m familiar with this group way back 2006, and I made a promise that I will join this group once I’m (formally) engaged too. I will definitely write a separate post regarding this group after my own wedding. But for now, I will just share the happiness and fun I’ve experienced during the recently concluded W@W Christmas Party 2012.

Last November 16, W@W held an early Christmas party for all w@wies and suppliers. It’s the best party I’ve attended so far.

It was great meeting the faces behind the signatures and names. It was a great event where brides-to-be, grooms-to-be, and newly-married couples get together and meet each other. Most of us knows each other and talks to each other thru the group and emails only. And most of us met each other for the first time that night, but the camaraderie was so natural. It seems like we know each other already from long before, and we are just having a reunion. The only common thing I think that binds us all together is that we are all members of this wedding community, W@W.

The party was a blast. It’s a very fun, successful and memorable event. All the big names in the wedding supplier’s community shared their talent and services for the love of W@W. Even the W@wies themselves shared their time, talent and creativity in making this event more fun and successful. For the first time in the history of W@W Christmas Party, the W@Wies had a dance presentation, and I’m proud that I’m one of the dancers. 

The last time I performed was 1997, that’s more than 10 years already. I’m glad I can still dance even if I’m not that great dancer anymore heheh! And no, I didn’t volunteer myself, I just saw my name was included in the performer’s list, and I’m not one party popper. I’m glad to dance in public for the love of w@W J We don’t have much time to practice together; we only have two nights to practice as a group. And during the practice, it was fun. I feel like I’m transported to my highschool days, where we used to have our dance practices for days until wee hours. It was fun practicing with you guys April (Pres), Icar, Fau, Arlene, Krystle, Neren, Erin, Gracey, Jhellie, Tintin, Donna, Vanessa, April Rose, and the supportive grooms also Manny, Jack (inalay talaga ni vanessa), Dino, Pierce and Jonas and Benjie. Hats off to Sir Abet for being cool, so with Bong Sare :-) Thank you also to Ms. Benz for staying with us during the practices and for "feeding" us. Thank you to Czar also for taking the video while we are doing our dance performance during the party. And also, thank you so much to Nicolai, our witty dance choreographer, you rock!

But like any other event, this isn’t a one-man show. It will not be a successful one without the joint efforts of all the suppliers and members. Since I’m a proud W@WIE and I really did enjoy the party, it’s just appropriate to give thanks & credits to whom it’s due. So please, bear with me if this post will look like an advertisement but take note, this isn’t a paid advertisement, I’m just one satisfied client :-)

The Venue: Blue Leaf

It was my first time to see this place, and I was in awe. It’s a beautiful place. How I wish I have book my wedding reception here but Taguig is quite far for all my guests. And, we had our 2 nights dance practice here, and we can never be thankful enough for them in accommodating our request.

Caterer: K By Cunanan

I’ve been reading lots of good feedbacks regarding their food and services. Too bad they are not included in the accredited suppliers of my wedding venue. I thought I will never get the chance to taste their food, but dreams do really comes true J My tummy was full even before dinner though because of the cocktail that they served. Yummylicious perfect! And the venue? It’s a winter wonderland theme.  Am I dreaming of a white Christmas? Too bad I don’t have good pictures of the venue.

Yes, I'm on diet :-)

They served cocktail plate also when we were seated already. Can't remember all, but those balls are cheese balls and it's yummy.

During the cocktail hour, there is also a dessert bar buffet by Joy San Gabriel. Another tick in my checklist. The pastries are all soooo yummy. Yeah, I tasted each pastries/cupcakes in the buffet. I just have to!

W@W Awards AVP: Mayad Studios

I liked their style even before. Great! If only I have a fairy godmother who will pledge for them :-)

Coordinator: Just Like ours - Queen David

They are the best at what they do.

Mobile, Lights & Sounds: Sensitivity

Even if they were not included in the Top 10 W@W Suppliers, their support to W@W never wavered. That's one good customer service. 

Stage Design: 4th Wall

The Stage; my picture doesn't give justice to it

Bonggang-bongga ang stage. Let me grabbed the words of Ms. Benz; I just hope I will not be charge of plagiarism :-)

"Ahh 4th Wall's support to W@W knows no bound. Had we asked for his liver I wouldn't be surprised if he would give it. That is how deep the love and bond and relationship has been. It is borne out of our beginnings. When both W@W and 4th Wall (Balay Kandila pa sila noon) was nobody and we barely had enough to make it thru the month, we were together. Nobody was happier than each other when one would attain success. Slowly W@W made its mark and started to find ways to gain financially, 4th Wall started carving their niche and slowly made it big, then bigger, then as big as they are na now. But no matter how much success we got, we would never forget those days when we eat by hands over dinner contemplating what to do with our future. Kaya siguro feeling nila pag W@W humingi ng favor walang nang bilang bilang, pati kaluluwa ibibigay nila basta kaya nila."

Who doesn't love photo booths? I'm addicted to it and I think I have a total of 13 pictures that night.

Nice Print / Style Diary

All I want for Christmas is you, Honey! (NicePrint / StyleDiaries)

Party Treasures

with my wedding photographers, Bryan Yap & Pie (Party Treasures)

FunposePhotobooth

TeraLifestyle

This is something new, and I find it really cool! It’s a touchscreen photobooth and you can draw or write something on the screen and it will be printed with the picture. For that, I had at least one picture with my H.

my picture with Honey by Tera Lifestyle :-)

Cocktail / Mocktail: Margarush and DNC Mobile Bar

I’m still checking my budget, but I really love to book any of the two for my own wedding! Yummy!

I didn't bother to bring out and use my camera anymore during the event because we have photographers from ImagineNation Photogrpahy namely Larry Leong, Alex Ruelo and Kimi. And well, I’m also waiting for the pictures from the other w@wies, I’m just going to tag and grab hehe!

Coffee Unplugged / Grace Osio. Who doesn't love coffee when you have yummy cakes and pastries. Indulgence!

They are not professional Hosts but the party was filled with fun and laughter, Bong Sare and CJ Lagman. Bong Sare even showed his dancing talent with us hehe!

Aside from the "Kendeng Girls and Grooms", there are also other w@wies who shared their talent and creativity. Hats off to OJ for the beautiful W@W Christmas Logo, button pins and stationary design.

with OJ

our W@W Christmas Pin, designed by OJ

The W@WIES Corner and Ribbon wall was arranged, organized and manned by Joed and Allan, Czar, Donna and Cecille. I hope I didn't miss anyone. :-)

And to all who sponsored the raffles, thank you so much for your generosity. I think the most exciting and most awaited part is the "veluz shoes for grab", I don't know what they call this game but there were 24 pairs of veluz shoes, where all the ladies can fit the shoes, and if the shoe fits, it's yours. I had three tries, but after the third try, I realized I'm not Cinderella because my prince charming already found me! (Naks! Hirit ng hindi nanalo!)

Before the riot begins...

if the shoe fits: Veluz Shoes 

Thanks for welcoming us "Overseas W@WIES" also. Thanks for the magic bayong lootbag :-)

Overseas W@WIES with Ms. Benz and Sir Abet

Pinoy treats for Balikbayan like me :-) Thanks W@W!

The party was really a blast! and a success, from the food, the venue, set-up, prizes, lootbags, games, and up to the smallest details. If it was a wedding event, I'm sure the Bride and groom including there guests will be in seventh heaven!

But more than anything else, thank you so much to the founders of W@W, Sir Abet Rana and Ms. Benz Rana. Thank you for creating this community. It's really a big help to all b2b & g2b, especially to the overseas based b2b and g2b. There's no W@W in the first place if there's no Mimma & Didda who spearheaded in creating/organizing/founding this community :-) More powers to you both and to the W@W community!

W@W with suppliers

Dreams and Dilemma

When I was younger, even until now, I always want to be a “stay-at-home-mom/wife” so that I can focus all my time and energy in taking care of my family, doing my hobbies, and at the same time managing a small business. It is a dream especially the business part, because I need a huge amount in order to invest in a business, and even after working abroad, I don’t have that huge amount to begin with.

From the very beginning, I told H about this childhood dream. He didn’t say much about it that time, maybe because that time he was not yet the marrying type. But, after a while, he told me that he wants me to continue working even if we get married, it’s not because he can’t support me but because he wants me to have my “financial independence”, and an extra income is good. I didn’t understand it that time. I was okay with the idea then that I will manage and do the budgeting of the family income. I was comfortable with that idea. Until, I lost my job unexpectedly.

The company I was working with was/ is in financial crisis due to mismanagement, due to that, the company decided to cut my contract earlier. I was devastated because my timeline was distracted due to the sudden change.  Suddenly, unexpectedly, I’m a defendant, I don't have that much "financial freedom" anymore. My expenses are controlled, I need to be a wise spender. I’m H’s legal wife already, but until now, I’m still uncomfortable with the idea of me being his defendant. I miss shopping without the feeling of guilt, I miss buying good things for myself because I have my own hard-earned money to spend , I miss buying gifts for my families, for H and his family, I miss treating my family for dinner or lunch, but don't get me wrong, I'm not living beyond my means, I just simply can afford this things. Now, with the sudden change in my financial status, I need to tighten the belt, spend wisely, avoid impulse buying, and again, I’m back to drooling over the stuff that I want to buy but I can’t because I have to save the money for something better or more important, and I don’t feel comfortable spending the money given to me. As a matter of fact, most of the monetary gifts that I usually receive, I don’t spend them at all, unless I’m in dire need of money. So, the same feeling goes to the money that I receive from H, it’s a gift so I should not spend it!

Right now, I’m using whatever savings I have for my monthly expenses. I divided it already and I have a fixed monthly allowance that will last until my wedding day. It’s the same amount as the basic salary now. With this small amount, and without fixed income, I can’t afford to splurge or spend more than that.  I’m trying to look for a job, but I think I’m facing a problem that most ex-OFW faces. It’s hard to look for a job here but it’s harder I think for ex-OFW to look for a job here since first, the employers have doubts of ex-OFW staying longer, they have doubts that you are just looking for a job for the meantime while you don’t have yet contract abroad but eventually, you will leave the job as soon as you get an offer overseas. Second, maybe they find me over-qualified because of my accomplishments and achievements and yet, under-qualified for the higher or highest position. Third, salary is too high even if you tell them it’s negotiable. Fourth, maybe they think you will start influencing other employees to go abroad too. I’m also considering applying for call-centers but I really don’t like to work in graveyard shifts since I need the rest and time to prepare for the wedding also, thus I prefer a regular working hours.

I’m already preparing myself mentally for this kind of set-up; after all, it’s my childhood dream to be a “stay-at-home mom/wife”. I was just push into it unexpectedly. H is very supportive about it already. He is always telling me that I don’t have to worry since he can take care of me and our future family. Of course, I can’t expect the same lifestyle that I was used to when I still have a job but we will not be poor also. We will live comfortably and within our means. Now, I just have to set my mind and try not to worry too much. I’m just so thankful that H has more faith in God than I do.

Ephesians 5:22-33

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For
the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his
body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also
wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself
up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water
through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without
stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same
way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his
wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they
feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are
members of his body. 31 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother
and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."[b] 32 This is a
profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each
one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must
respect her husband.

Colossians 3:19 - Husbands, love [your] wives, and be not bitter against them.

1 Peter 3:7
-7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and
treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the
gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

20 Things I want to tell to Engaged and Newlywed Women

20 Things I want to tell to Engaged and Newlywed Women

1. Marriage is made up of two good forgivers. Because every marriage is made up of two sinners. (Romans 3:23)

2. At some point, you will have to learn that life isn’t all about you. (Philippians 2:3)

3. Don’t listen to women that tell you that passion fades…it doesn’t have to! (um…all of Song of Solomon)

4. Don’t give up. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13)

5. He wants a kind wife, not a maid or another mother. Be nice. (Galatians 5:22-23)

6. Give your husband the gift of your respect. He needs it more than you know. (Ephesians 5:33)

7. Be mindful of your expectations.

8. Honor the Lord above all things. Colossians 3: 17

9. Find your worth and security in the Lord, and don’t look to your husband to meet all of your needs.

10. Be very careful about reading romance novels, they set you up for an unrealistic view of romance.

11. Real romance is finding that one spot in the crook of his arm to snuggle into, that shared look over the dinner table when the kids are acting crazy, and the way he fixes the leaky sink when he is dog-tired after work.

12. Love is about relationship. The more I love my husband, and seek a relationship with him, the less critical and duty-bound I become. It is similar to my relationship with God.

13. Be thankful for the husband you have. Accept him as he is, not for what you want him to be.

14. Don’t compare!! Don’t buy into the game of comparing him with anyone else’s husband.

15.The Biblically “normal” marriage is filled with joy, connection, laughter, and peace. It’s not free of hurt feelings and conflict, but they know how to process their pain with one another so that they live more often in a meadow than at the scene of a train wreck. This is not the average marriage, but it normal – -because it is a visible display of Jesus’ relationship with His bride (Ephesians 5:22-33).

16. Your marriage is a testimony! “The #1 evangelistic tool in America (the world) today is a successful marriage, because it’s a living miracle!” – Dr. Joe Aldrich, former president of Multnomah Bible College.

17. Pray for your marriage. Pray hard.

18.I’ve heard that is gets better with age.

19. Where there is God, there is always hope. Even for the most broken marriages. “With God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26)

20.Marriage is commitment and sacrifice. But it’s also the best, most wild ride you will ever have with your best friend.

Source : http://gracefullmama.com/20-things-i-want-to-tell-engaged-and-newlywed-women/

Chittagong Trip

H’s family is originally from Paterghatta, Chittagong. Chittagong is another region or division of banglandesh. Majority of the Christians/Catholics in Bangladesh hails from Paterghatta, it's the seat of the Roman catholic diocese. The Christians/Catholics community is not that big.  Everybody knows everyone, not only about who you are but also of what you are. Familiarity is so common that most of the time, you hear them saying “the son of this who works as this and the brother/sister of who” in referring to someone or whenever introducing someone. There is always a linkage.

Auntie and I had to go to Paterghatta to get a fresh copy of H’s Baptismal Certificate. It was a short trip since we stayed there for one whole day only, but the 1^st and 3^rd day was for travelling. It’s quite memorable because it was my first time to travel via train, and my first time to travel alone with auntie.

Going to Chittagong, we bought a Cabin ticket but we shared the cabin with one family. It was not really a comfortable ride since we can’t really lie down on the couch as we shared it with the other passengers but it was a hassle free trip since there’s no jam, there were only pit-stops that last up to 10 minutes. The scenery is different from the sceneries you see when travelling by bus. And of course, the common problem when travelling is clean washrooms. I was able to use the train’s washroom, (it’s a squat toilet) before starting the trip and it was clean, but I didn’t use it anymore after that, so I’m not sure if it is still clean during the trip.

The Bungalow

We arrived around 4pm in Chittagong and we stayed with auntie’s cousin. It’s a bungalow house with a front and back yard. It’s inside a government property, a housing facility provided for government employees during their tenure of service. It’s a nice place to live, something similar to my dream house, but I will just change the lay-out of the house but still the area is huge. It is a good place for small kids to play and run around.

The following morning, we left early for the parish office because we only have the whole day to do everything, get the baptismal certificate and to roam around to visit some relatives and old places. When we were in the parish office, I find the clerk not friendly but it’s okay, at least we got the certificate. I just find him irritating and not suitable as a parish clerk.

We visited the graveyards of auntie’s parents and uncle’s parents. It’s just beside the church. Then we went to one of uncle’s aunt, his mom’s sister, and she’s the mother-in-law of auntie’s youngest sister. Yes, the community is really that small that one is related to one another by blood or by law. After that we went to see also auntie’s old family house. It’s a small two storey house. H spent his first few growing up years in that house. Auntie showed me also the tea shop where H’s used to hang out while waiting for the paratha. 

H's Grade school grounds, first room from left was his Pre-school & Kinder classroom

Then we also went to his old grade school. It was nice to see his childhood place and finally see the actual places that I usually hear only in their stories.

Going back to Dhaka, we took the 7am trip, this time it's not the cabin but the coach seat, it's like a bus. This train line is a straight trip, there's no pit-stops so it took us 5 hours to reached Dhaka. 

H promised me that we will go back there and he will tour me around himself.

My Precious

"My Precious!" 

Believe me I can say it the way Smeagol/Gollum says it in the LOTR movie :-) And whenever I say it with the hand-movements also, it freaks-out H's cousin. Of course, I do that sometimes on purpose just to scare H's cousin.

In the movie, "My Precious" refers to the One Ring. And this entry is suppose to be about "our own Precious", but until now we haven't purchase our wedding rings. I'm still in search of our precious.

Before coming home, H and I checked the Apan Jewelry in Bangladesh. But they don't have a decent looking wedding banns. Most of the rings they have are the huge gold rings, the typical rings that are usually given during Bangladeshi muslim or hindu weddings, and they don't customize since most of the jewelries are imported. So, we just took our ring sizes and decided to purchase the rings here in the Philippines. H was even surprise to know that there are jewelers here who can customize gold rings.

Based from the wedding forum, the known and reputable suppliers for wedding rings are Goldenhills, Mayfair and your very own jeweler from the province of Bulacan. There are other suppliers but maybe they have a steep price tag already that's why they are not popular in the wedding forum. Yesterday, we dropped by Edsa Shangri-la to check Sunjewel but too bad, they  are close on sundays. 

Originally, my plan was to attend the Bridal fair in MOA but we ended up in Nuvali with my sister and her family. Call it a detour :-) By the time we got back to Manila, it's already 5pm, and we took C5 instead of Magallanes, so I decided to just check "Goldenhills" showroom in Galleria. 

In the showroom, there are lots of rings to choose from, unlike in their website. They can customize also a design. The first few rings that they showed me were way beyond our budget so I just told them straightforward what's my budget. Good thing, they have rings also within my budget range, and at the moment they have 20% discount. I already inquired regarding the design that I like but too bad, the quote is beyond the budget too. So, I still have to canvass other suppliers or I may just end up buying whatever is on display.

And, because of this search, I found out that the International Ring Sizes varies from country to country. There's US/canada, German, Japanese, Swiss and British ring sizes. When we took our ring sizes in Bangladesh, I'm size 9 while H is size 19, but here in the Philippines, I'm size 5. The sales attendant in Goldenhills advised me to check the chart in the net since they don't have a chart in their showroom. That's a bummer or maybe they are just too lazy to look for the chart.

Anyway, I checked Mr. google and this is what I found out:

Looks like, Bangladesh or rather the Apan Jewelry follows the Japanese size and Philippines follows the USA/Canada size. I just hope I'm right with this one, then that means H's ring size is 9 1/2.

So for now, I'm still in search for our precious. I'm looking for simple ones, something that I can wear everyday without fear that someone will snatch it away from me. These are the pegs:

I want it with 5 diamond stones for me  if  it's within the budget.

White gold with two different finish - glossy and matte

P.S.

I already found our wedding ring supplier. She is a nice person and she was able to give me design options based on our budget. Now, in two weeks time, she will be able to deliver "Our Precious" :-)

Constant Change

“There’s a universal truth we all have to face, whether we want to or not, everything eventually ends. Endings are inevitable. We say goodbye."

When I left my previous company, I created this video as part of my farewell email to them. It's a compilation of pictures taken during my 4 1/2 years of service in the company. Mostly are pictures during showroom openings and inauguration, campaign launching and other company programs.



"There is only one thing that is constant in life...that is change"

Wedding Preps Updates: Documents

8 months and 3 weeks and 6 days to go before our wedding, and here are the additional accomplishments. I mentioned in one of my post about our Church wedding requirements, and I’m so glad that we already got new copies of all H’s documents.

"Confirmation Certificate"

The first document that we were able to get is his Confirmation certificate. It was a breeze getting a fresh copy of this one. No hassles at all even if in the record book his father’s name was wrong. We just requested the Parish Priest to copy the names written in H’s old baptismal certificate. And the priest did so without questioning us further or making a big deal out of it. If it is in Manila, for sure they will require us to get an affidavit or maybe question us rigorously. And he also wrote the note “For Marriage Purpose” when I asked him to please write it there in the bottom. Yes, I told the priest to “write” it down since the certificate was handwritten. Think about old school.

"Birth Certificate"

The second document was his birth certificate. Finally, someone is registered! Prior to that, H doesn’t know what’s a birth certificate is and he is not also aware about its existence. When he told me that he doesn’t have one, I started googling about it, as to where to get it or what’s the equivalent document, and got the information at the UNICEF blogsite. Only after my research when H was convinced that there is a Birth Registration and he can get a certificate for that. Birth registration exists here but it is not being followed and the Birth Certificate is not given any importance. It was the 2004 Births and Deaths Registration Act that made birth registration compulsory for all persons born in Bangladesh. So, finally, on my birthday he went to the city corporation to register himself.

"Baptismal Certificate"

Third, his baptismal certificate. We had to schedule a trip to Chittagong for this one since he was born and baptized in Chittagong. I went with his mom to Chittagong via train and this trip deserves a separate blog entry. We arrived in Chittagong around 3pm and we couldn’t do any work that day anymore, so we went to the parish office first thing in the following morning.  If the priests in Dhaka were helpful and friendly, this time, the clerk there was annoying. Or let’s say, I find his attitude not fitting for someone working in a religious institution. Anyway, I’m still thankful that we were able to get it after 2 hours, even if he didn’t want to type the “For Marriage Purpose” note since according to him, there’s no space for that and they don’t really do that. This time, the certificate is type-written.

"Certificate of Singleness"

Fourth, his Certificate of Singleness. This one is quite a hassle because first there was a mistake in the date, the date should be before the civil wedding date. And, it's annoying when someone will have to tell me that it is okay when it is not what I require. Then again they don’t know what title to write in the subject. It seems that the advocate was not familiar with the certificate but well, we just have to trust him as he is known to H’s cousin-in-law. They end up writing "Certificate of Singleness" as per my instruction.

"Declaration of Marriage"

And we also got our “Declaration of Marriage” certificate on the same day that we got his Certificate of Singleness. Yes, we got married civilly here in order to omit some requirements in the Philippines and that is the “clearance to marry” from his embassy in the Philippines and the Marriage License from the city hall. We will not have enough time to apply & get for that clearance & license (both require physical appearances) since he will be in manila 5 days before our wedding only. So, we decided to get married civilly so that he doesn’t have to go to the embassy and apply for the clearance and we can submit our Marriage Certificate instead of the Marriage License. Yes, I’m his legal wife here already but not yet in the Philippines since it’s not registered there yet. Well, that’s just my own joke to him. I'm eligible to apply for "Non-Resident Visa" or "NVR" already, but we decided to just get it after our church wedding since one requirement for that is to stay here for a year which is not possible right now.

"Registration of Marriage"

We already applied for our Registration of Marriage in the Philippine Embassy, and we will have to wait for another two months before I can request a copy from NSO. Even if we are legally married now, we are not staying together as husband and wife yet because for us, the civil wedding was for documentation purposes only. We want to really celebrate our married life together after our church wedding. Yeah, so near yet so far :-) Our embassy here in Dhaka does not administer marriage between Filipino and a foreigner, I'm not sure about in other countries.

"Pre-Cana Certificates"

Fifth, our pre-cana certificates. We are required to attend the class together, so we asked permission from the Chancery we can have it here since it’s impossible for us to be able to attend it together in manila. We had the Pre-cana at the Holy Spirit Major Seminary in Banani, and they required us to submit a letter of recommendation from our respective parishes. I got my one from Our Lady of Mt. Carmel Shrine since we are getting married there and he got one from the Holy Rosary Parish in Tejgaon. I will write a separate post regarding our pre-cana class.

"Certificate of No Impediment"

Sixth, finally we got a letter of “No Church Impediment”. We had to go back to Tejgaon to get this one after we got our pre-cana certificates. This letter is to inform the chancery that we don’t have any impediments here, stating that we are free to marry each other and that none of us was/were married before to anyone or other people.

I’m so happy with our progress. I will bring home all the documents with me and will submit it to the Chancery once I get new copies of my baptismal and confirmation certificates. I’m still undecided if I’m going home to Vigan to get this or just ask my friend to get it for me. While my Birth Certificate and CENOMAR (Certificate of No Marriage) from NSO was received by my sister already in manila. The only thing left are the Marriage Banns and the Canonical Interview. The Banns we will have to post by February 2013 and the interview we will have it on May 14, 2013. After that, we will get a clearance from the Chancery which we will submit to the church so that we can get married.

UPDATE: October 7, 2012

After a month of following up with my friend who is based in Vigan, finally, they found my Confirmation Certificate.
 It was not in the Parish Office but it was in my Highschool's Campus Minister's office since I received my confirmation from our school. The reason why we checked the parish office first because my mom told me she got my sister's certificate from there and we received our confirmation at the same time, so I assumed that my one is also there. Only to find out that the Parish Office decided to return the records to the origin or where the event was held. When my friend went to the campus office, they can't find my original record also, but since I'm known to them, they were able to furnish me a copy of the certificate.
So finally, with all the documents in hand, I went to the Chancery last October 4 to submit it already. Ms. Bessie is one pleasant lady, we even chatted for few minutes about my life in BD. And now, she reminded me my only pending documents - the wedding banns, NSO Marriage Certificate and the canonical interview. She explained it to me that I have to get all the docs from her again prior to our Canonical interview and then return it back to her after that, and after 3 working days, our clearance will be release and this clearance, we have to submit it to Mt. Carmel so that they will allow us to get married :-) I'm so happy with my accomplishments. Now, if only I can proceed with my plans of DIY projects like the kissing bells-cum-escort card, table number lay-out, AVP, cord, and other small things. I hope mr. sun will keep on shining so that I can go to the wholesaler heaven called Divisoria and also to check Wellmason again in Quaipo for the beads and accessories for the cord.