It's Bangladesh's Independence Day! That makes it a non-working holiday here, so I'm home alone again. And still, I'm in wedding preps mode. Research, browse, daydream, drool on someone else's wedding gowns,suppliers and preparations! Oh! If only I can spend that much money for my own wedding :-)
While browsing, I chance upon this article from weddingsatwork.com . Well, Filipinos are known for "not replying to the RSVP", but I hope my carefully selected guests will find time to RSVP and to actually attend the event.
You're Invited ! Q & A for Wedding Guests by: John & Benz Rana
Q. I got an invite but have no plans of attending; should I still send a gift?
A.First thing's first. If you won't be able to attend for whatever reason, please RSVP. A big chunk of the wedding budget goes to the reception and it will be utterly inconsiderate to just give up a reserved seat without letting the couple know. Give them the chance to assign that seat to another guest in their "waitlist." Having that out of the way, let's get to your question: YES, it is customary to still send a gift.
Q. The envelope bears only my name. May I ask if I can bring a date?
A. Don't bring a date unless your invitation specifically says "and Guest." Bringing unexpected guests is very impolite. Neither should you ask the couple's permission if you may bring one or not. Don't put your friends on the spot. We Filipinos don't really like turning down people. So how would you know if their "Yes" means yes or not? Spare them that trouble.
Q. The invite says "Mr. & Mrs." Could we bring our kids?
A. Never bring the kids unless "& Family" is indicated. Soon-to-weds don't usually invite children for a good reason. Kids get bored or cranky during hour-long masses. Their tantrums might disrupt the solemnity of the ceremony. Weddings are usually formal events typically not appropriate for the little ones. To be blunt about it, inviting a child at the reception means added two mouths to feed - the kid's and the yaya's.
Follow-up Q. But my son/daughter is the bearer/flower girl. I'm sure it's understood that my other child is invited.
A. Which part of the answer above didn't you understand? Seriously, if the couple wanted to invite your other kid, they would have specified that on the envelope.
2nd follow-up Q. But I'm breastfeeding, I'm sure my friends will understand, won't they?
A. Granting that it's an infant and he or she won't eat at the reception - let's even assume that your baby won't wail at the church - the answer is still NO! Not even if you've perfected the art of being a cow in a long gown. Four words: Breast Pump and Babysitter!
Q. I don't have a clue what gift to give them. Any ideas?
A. The average Pinoy soon-to-wed would always prefer monetary gifts more than any other gift. It is the unspoken fact. We're telling you now to make it easier for them to let you know what they REALLY want; unless they indicated that already in their invites which, by the way, is a very tacky thing to do.
If you're not comfortable giving cash, you may ask the couple where they are registered (Gift / Bridal Registry) and choose from what's listed under their names in the store. You can also ask them where they're residing after the wedding and take the cue from there. If you know that they'll be migrating abroad or living with their parents for the time being, a ref or another oven toaster may not be the most practical and logical gift.
Q. I'm convinced. So how much cash should I give them? I don't want to give too little or too much.
A. That's a hard thing to answer. It's really a case-to-case thing. Try to put yourself in the couple's shoes. How much should a guest of your stature give you without being branded a cheapskate? Also consider your relationship with the couple. If you're good friends of the couple's parents, you'll probably shell-out more than if you were simply the bride's Girl Friday.
Q. Could I skip the ceremony and head straight to the reception?
A. You can. BUT you shouldn't! You are invited to THE wedding -- that's the part where they exchange their "I dos." The reception is where the Receiving Line is. You can't be 'received' if you are already seated in the hall, right? "Patay-gutom" is too harsh a word and we assure you that it's by no means what anyone would think if indeed you decide to go straight to the reception. But admit that it struck a nerve just mentioning the word in that context, isn't it?
Q. Speaking of the Receiving Line, what should be the proper greeting?
A. Here's the rule: Say "Congratulations" to the groom and "Best Wishes" to the bride. The reason behind is that "congrats" implies that someone has caught something or won a prize, and it is rather improper to imply that the bride "caught" the man who married her. If this rule gets mixed-up in your head come wedding day, just say the two phrases together and look at both of them. That usually works!
Likewise, saying "Good Luck!" no matter how pure your wishes are will also sound very inappropriate for obvious reasons.
Q. Nice try, but what if the couple makes a Grand Entrance and left the Receiving Line to their parents? What then should I tell them? Note that I don't even know which sets of parents are whose.
A. Didn't we tell you already not to skip the ceremony? The bride and groom usually walk alongside their respective parents at the very start!
Anyway, make your pleasantries short and sweet. Shake their hands and say "Hello! I'm (your name) and I went to school with (name of bride/groom) in (school's name)/an officemate of (name of bride/groom) at (name of company)." They usually respond with "Nice meeting you." Just smile, nod politely, and move on to the next person. If one replies "Hi! I've heard so much about you!", simply smile and nod just the same. No lengthy conversation; just make small talk at most. If you can't find the words to say, just smile again, nod politely, and move.
Q. During the banquet, is there anything I need to know?
A. Nowadays, the Reception Program usually have the guests on each table stand up and have their picture taken with the couple before being led to the buffet. This is done to resolve two issues of past weddings: (a) for the couple's convenience and skip the tiring Table-Hopping ritual just to have their picture taken with all their guests; and (b) for the guests' convenience so they won't have to wait very long for their turn in the buffet line.
Keep in mind that Buffet is NOT synonymous with "Eat-All-You-Can." Do not pile your plate full. Be courteous of those who have yet to be served. Don't worry. You can easily go for seconds.
Q. I'm used to a Buffet setting, but what if it's a formal Sit-Down Dinner? Which fork do I start with again?
A. You're on your own, pal. Watch "Pretty Woman" again and see how Julia Roberts nailed it!
Monday, March 26, 2012
Sunday, March 18, 2012
To Do's: 6-12 months ahead
Let's see if I'm on track...we are 1 year and 2 months ahead of time.
.Announce engagement to family and close friends. - Will have an small engagement party after the lent.
.Choose and finalize wedding date. - May 18, 2013
.Estimate the budget and consult with you and your fiance's families. - we have a budget in mind already and we are trying our best to stick to it, but there will be lots of miscellaneous expenses not necessarily included in our wedding budget.
.Decide on the theme - formal or informal, big or small - and color motifs. - we have an idea but still need detailing.
.Approximate the size of your guest list. - 80 - 100 guests only. Close relatives and friends.
.Send out save-the-dates to all relevant guests. - send the first STD e-card to H's family.
.Decide on the time of day you want the ceremonies to take place. - ceremony is at 330pm followed by the reception
.Book a wedding coordinator, if desired. Select one which you have the most rapport with. - still shortlisting
.Book your church or ceremony location.- Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, already reserved
.Look for a reception venue and book as soon as possible. - Oasis Orchard Lounge, reserved just need to give the final DP on April 10.
.Arrange appointments with your priest or civil marriage celebrant.
.Start working on the church or civil registry requirements. Obtain the necessary documents, which may sometimes take time. -it's stressing me but I hope it will work according to our schedules. God is so good :-) After a series of correspondence, the Chancery already granted our request :-)
.Select principal and secondary sponsors and confirm their participation. (Will-you-be cards)- asked one already, still considering the others.
.Select wedding entourage and confirm their participation. (Will-you-be cards) - pencil draft already.
.Select liturgical members and confirm participation. - pencil draft already
.Start choosing the wedding gown designer and set an initial meeting to discuss style preference. - making a shortlist to check this May.
.Start looking for barongs/suits. - H will look into it.
.Make a shortlist of possible suppliers (photographer, caterer, cake-maker, videographer, musicians, etc.) and set initial meeting to discuss theme and budget. - contacted some of the suppliers already and will set a meeting in May.
.Discuss honeymoon destination and make travel bookings; update passports if necessary. - will definitely update all their passports as it will all expires next year. Haha!
.Discuss your new home after the wedding. - according to him, stay with the in-laws for year :-(
.Draft your wedding invitations and misalettes, as approved by your church. - got a copy of mike's one.
.Begin a health and beauty routine. - will definitely start eating healthy and exercising.
What else???
.Announce engagement to family and close friends. - Will have an small engagement party after the lent.
.
.
.Decide on the theme - formal or informal, big or small - and color motifs. - we have an idea but still need detailing.
.
.Send out save-the-dates to all relevant guests. - send the first STD e-card to H's family.
.
.Book a wedding coordinator, if desired. Select one which you have the most rapport with. - still shortlisting
.Arrange appointments with your priest or civil marriage celebrant.
.Start working on the church or civil registry requirements. Obtain the necessary documents, which may sometimes take time. -
.Select principal and secondary sponsors and confirm their participation. (Will-you-be cards)- asked one already, still considering the others.
.Select wedding entourage and confirm their participation. (Will-you-be cards) - pencil draft already.
.Select liturgical members and confirm participation. - pencil draft already
.Start choosing the wedding gown designer and set an initial meeting to discuss style preference. - making a shortlist to check this May.
.Start looking for barongs/suits. - H will look into it.
.Make a shortlist of possible suppliers (photographer, caterer, cake-maker, videographer, musicians, etc.) and set initial meeting to discuss theme and budget. - contacted some of the suppliers already and will set a meeting in May.
.Discuss honeymoon destination and make travel bookings; update passports if necessary. - will definitely update all their passports as it will all expires next year. Haha!
.Discuss your new home after the wedding. - according to him, stay with the in-laws for year :-(
.Draft your wedding invitations and misalettes, as approved by your church. - got a copy of mike's one.
.Begin a health and beauty routine. - will definitely start eating healthy and exercising.
What else???
Saturday, March 17, 2012
My Man
While bloghopping, I saw this wonderful article from this blog. I asked permission to share it here also. A year from now, I'll be getting married to a wonderful man, who loves me with all his heart and in the best way he knows.I know I'm marrying a good man, whether he is a smoker or non-smoker. That's not what defines him really, but non-smoker is a plus points.
I used to date guys who doesn't smoke. Actually, that's one criteria that I look for a guy. I don't smoke and i hate the smell of the cigarette's smoke. My dad smokes a lot, and in our small apartment, whenever he is around smoking, the air feels cloggy, congested, and polluted. He stopped before but then for some reasons, he went back to his habit. But, I don't hate smokers, I just don't like having a boyfriend who smokes. I read somewhere before, it's gross kissing an ashtray.
H used to smoke. He started young, maybe around 15, and it's normal here. Smoking here is like a status symbol for men. It seems like 9 out 10 men here are smokers. They are not just casual smokers but chain smokers. But, the guys here are discreet with their smoking, they don't smoke with lady colleagues around, or with boss around even if the boss smokes too, or with someone who's higher than them but not necessarily their boss. Like my driver, I know that he smokes, and he knows that I know that, but whenever he sees me, he hides his cigarettes behind him. Same with my other colleagues, either they excuse themselves or do not smoke until I leave. Ladies who smokes are not openly accepted here.
H knows from the very start that I don't like guys who smokes. When we started dating, he lessen his smoking. From 5 sticks a day, it came down to 3 sticks a day. After-a-while, it became occasionally smoking. And finally, he totally dropped the habit. It's been 3 1/2 years now. That's for me is one of his biggest sacrifice in the name of love, for I know how difficult it is to dropped a habit. And that is one thing I love about him too, he is one disciplined man and a goal achiever.
I copied the whole article here to share. It's a wonderful thing to read. I just see my man in this article. It's even similar to an article I read a few weeks ago, I just can't recall the title but it's something about "Marry a Girl who Travels".
MARRY A MAN WHO DOESN’T SMOKE
by Julie Trinidad.
(Inspired by Marry a Woman Who Can Read)
Marry a man who doesn’t smoke- because the man who doesn’t smoke lives a healthy lifestyle. And because his body is healthy, his mind is healthy too. Since he’s in his right mind, he thinks before he speaks and acts on what is proper and not on mere impulse.
A man who doesn’t smoke knows the value of time. He doesn’t while it away by puffing a cigarette nor go out of his way just to find a light. And because he knows the value of time, he will surely treasure every moment you’re together. He will never forget the important milestones in your life, and he won’t show up late on your wedding day ,instead he’ll be there handsomely waiting for you by the altar looking and smelling all fresh since he didn’t have to smoke before your exchange of vows.
Marry a man who doesn’t smoke because a man who doesn’t smoke is disciplined. Since he has self control, he doesn’t binge nor cringe on pressures brought about by work, peers or family problems. Since he doesn’t break in pressure, he only becomes stronger and better through time. Since he’s in control, he’s responsible and because he’s responsible, he’ll take care of you and your family, he won’t leave you begging and crying or worrying about tomorrow, and will let you live a life that you deserve.
A man who doesn’t smoke knows how to say no to the things he doesn’t need. Since he knows he doesn’t need a cigarette to be sane nor to look cool, he’s wise enough to say no to illegal drugs, and other vices, more so to addiction to any of it. Since the man refuses to give in to the bad stuff, he’ll be wise enough to say no to other temptations that will come along his way.
Marry a man who doesn’t smoke-because a man who doesn’t smoke is not selfish. He doesn’t think of himself, and what he wants alone but considers the people around him as well. Since he’s considerate, he’ll always think about your happiness and the welfare of your children. Because he’s selfless, he’ll never hurt you (not deliberately at least), nor leave you for another, especially not for the man in a cowboy hat.
The man who doesn’t smoke may not be perfect, but he’ll surely be a cut above the rest. For this man knows his values and knows how to value his life and everything in it. And because he values life, he values love so he’ll value you-as his wife and because he values you, he’ll treat you with much care and compassion. He’ll try his best to please you and love you the best way he knows how. And because he’ll love you like that, you’ll never have to look for a prince charming nor a knight in shining armour anymore in your quest for a fairy tale. He won’t leave you delusional fretting over Prince William’s wedding, wishing hopelessly that you’d be Kate even just for a day. Because this man who doesn’t smoke, whom you married, will give you his healthy, responsible, and selfless (not to mention smokeless) heart, with the love
that’s FOR REAL- no butts, toxin-free.
But what like I said earlier, smoking doesn't define my H. He is a man with discipline and values even before, he just added more value to his life and to his family when he decided to quit smoking.
I used to date guys who doesn't smoke. Actually, that's one criteria that I look for a guy. I don't smoke and i hate the smell of the cigarette's smoke. My dad smokes a lot, and in our small apartment, whenever he is around smoking, the air feels cloggy, congested, and polluted. He stopped before but then for some reasons, he went back to his habit. But, I don't hate smokers, I just don't like having a boyfriend who smokes. I read somewhere before, it's gross kissing an ashtray.
H used to smoke. He started young, maybe around 15, and it's normal here. Smoking here is like a status symbol for men. It seems like 9 out 10 men here are smokers. They are not just casual smokers but chain smokers. But, the guys here are discreet with their smoking, they don't smoke with lady colleagues around, or with boss around even if the boss smokes too, or with someone who's higher than them but not necessarily their boss. Like my driver, I know that he smokes, and he knows that I know that, but whenever he sees me, he hides his cigarettes behind him. Same with my other colleagues, either they excuse themselves or do not smoke until I leave. Ladies who smokes are not openly accepted here.
H knows from the very start that I don't like guys who smokes. When we started dating, he lessen his smoking. From 5 sticks a day, it came down to 3 sticks a day. After-a-while, it became occasionally smoking. And finally, he totally dropped the habit. It's been 3 1/2 years now. That's for me is one of his biggest sacrifice in the name of love, for I know how difficult it is to dropped a habit. And that is one thing I love about him too, he is one disciplined man and a goal achiever.
I copied the whole article here to share. It's a wonderful thing to read. I just see my man in this article. It's even similar to an article I read a few weeks ago, I just can't recall the title but it's something about "Marry a Girl who Travels".
MARRY A MAN WHO DOESN’T SMOKE
by Julie Trinidad.
(Inspired by Marry a Woman Who Can Read)
Marry a man who doesn’t smoke- because the man who doesn’t smoke lives a healthy lifestyle. And because his body is healthy, his mind is healthy too. Since he’s in his right mind, he thinks before he speaks and acts on what is proper and not on mere impulse.
A man who doesn’t smoke knows the value of time. He doesn’t while it away by puffing a cigarette nor go out of his way just to find a light. And because he knows the value of time, he will surely treasure every moment you’re together. He will never forget the important milestones in your life, and he won’t show up late on your wedding day ,instead he’ll be there handsomely waiting for you by the altar looking and smelling all fresh since he didn’t have to smoke before your exchange of vows.
Marry a man who doesn’t smoke because a man who doesn’t smoke is disciplined. Since he has self control, he doesn’t binge nor cringe on pressures brought about by work, peers or family problems. Since he doesn’t break in pressure, he only becomes stronger and better through time. Since he’s in control, he’s responsible and because he’s responsible, he’ll take care of you and your family, he won’t leave you begging and crying or worrying about tomorrow, and will let you live a life that you deserve.
A man who doesn’t smoke knows how to say no to the things he doesn’t need. Since he knows he doesn’t need a cigarette to be sane nor to look cool, he’s wise enough to say no to illegal drugs, and other vices, more so to addiction to any of it. Since the man refuses to give in to the bad stuff, he’ll be wise enough to say no to other temptations that will come along his way.
Marry a man who doesn’t smoke-because a man who doesn’t smoke is not selfish. He doesn’t think of himself, and what he wants alone but considers the people around him as well. Since he’s considerate, he’ll always think about your happiness and the welfare of your children. Because he’s selfless, he’ll never hurt you (not deliberately at least), nor leave you for another, especially not for the man in a cowboy hat.
The man who doesn’t smoke may not be perfect, but he’ll surely be a cut above the rest. For this man knows his values and knows how to value his life and everything in it. And because he values life, he values love so he’ll value you-as his wife and because he values you, he’ll treat you with much care and compassion. He’ll try his best to please you and love you the best way he knows how. And because he’ll love you like that, you’ll never have to look for a prince charming nor a knight in shining armour anymore in your quest for a fairy tale. He won’t leave you delusional fretting over Prince William’s wedding, wishing hopelessly that you’d be Kate even just for a day. Because this man who doesn’t smoke, whom you married, will give you his healthy, responsible, and selfless (not to mention smokeless) heart, with the love
that’s FOR REAL- no butts, toxin-free.
But what like I said earlier, smoking doesn't define my H. He is a man with discipline and values even before, he just added more value to his life and to his family when he decided to quit smoking.
Wedding Preps
Preparing for a wedding is tough. Preparing a wedding from overseas is tougher. Preparing a wedding from overseas between Filipino and a foreigner is the toughest.
It's not about the selection of suppliers and hiring the best suppliers, but the process and procedure of getting a “Clearance to Marry” is what making it tough and hard. Once you booked the church and the venue, booking other suppliers are easy and not even a big deal anymore once you face the reality of acquiring a Clearance to Marry. What is a Clearance to Marry? This is a clearance from the Chancery/Diocese that soon-to-be-married couple who falls under mixed marriages should acquire and submit to the church apart from the other basic required documents in order to get married. Without this clearance, couple cannot get married in the church.
All the things are doable, that is, if you have the liberty of time. But for us overseas worker whose vacation leave is upon the decision of the big bosses, based on work load and other company issues, it’s tough. And this is what stressing me. H is reluctant of availing more than 10 days vacation leave. That’s the maximum days one can apply in a stretch, and he is so pessimistic with this matter. He already thinks that the company will not give him special considerations. He didn’t ask yet but he is already saying that the company will not allow him more than 10 days. So, he is pushing me to negotiate with the Chancery to accommodate us 5 days before our wedding date instead of their 10 days advisory.
I’m also praying that the Chancery will give us special considerations since it is really tough getting leave. And we really want to get married in the church in the Philippines. But like what my friend said, this so-called rules of the institution was created to give us a hard life when it is not written anywhere in the Bible. Thus, he has lots of questions about our religion. Most of the practices and rules are not written or given by God but by human beings already. These things do not necessarily make our life more spiritually or easy. Oftentimes, this rules are like hindrances and barriers and roots for ill-feelings towards the church.
I couldn’t help it but feel indifferent and sad. I don’t know if I will feel anger towards H for not being so positive about it or to the church for giving us tough time. I even thought that if they will not permit us, then I will not get married in the church and I will forever blame the church for not giving me my dream wedding. But my mom said, it’s a test of my faith. If you really want something, you really have to work for it. When you have it, and when you achieve the fruits of your hard work, you will cherish it more and appreciate it more. In the end, you will work harder for a successful married life because you will always remember the hard road you have to pass in order to be in that married life.
I just hope everything will work according to our schedules.
It's not about the selection of suppliers and hiring the best suppliers, but the process and procedure of getting a “Clearance to Marry” is what making it tough and hard. Once you booked the church and the venue, booking other suppliers are easy and not even a big deal anymore once you face the reality of acquiring a Clearance to Marry. What is a Clearance to Marry? This is a clearance from the Chancery/Diocese that soon-to-be-married couple who falls under mixed marriages should acquire and submit to the church apart from the other basic required documents in order to get married. Without this clearance, couple cannot get married in the church.
All the things are doable, that is, if you have the liberty of time. But for us overseas worker whose vacation leave is upon the decision of the big bosses, based on work load and other company issues, it’s tough. And this is what stressing me. H is reluctant of availing more than 10 days vacation leave. That’s the maximum days one can apply in a stretch, and he is so pessimistic with this matter. He already thinks that the company will not give him special considerations. He didn’t ask yet but he is already saying that the company will not allow him more than 10 days. So, he is pushing me to negotiate with the Chancery to accommodate us 5 days before our wedding date instead of their 10 days advisory.
I’m also praying that the Chancery will give us special considerations since it is really tough getting leave. And we really want to get married in the church in the Philippines. But like what my friend said, this so-called rules of the institution was created to give us a hard life when it is not written anywhere in the Bible. Thus, he has lots of questions about our religion. Most of the practices and rules are not written or given by God but by human beings already. These things do not necessarily make our life more spiritually or easy. Oftentimes, this rules are like hindrances and barriers and roots for ill-feelings towards the church.
I couldn’t help it but feel indifferent and sad. I don’t know if I will feel anger towards H for not being so positive about it or to the church for giving us tough time. I even thought that if they will not permit us, then I will not get married in the church and I will forever blame the church for not giving me my dream wedding. But my mom said, it’s a test of my faith. If you really want something, you really have to work for it. When you have it, and when you achieve the fruits of your hard work, you will cherish it more and appreciate it more. In the end, you will work harder for a successful married life because you will always remember the hard road you have to pass in order to be in that married life.
I just hope everything will work according to our schedules.
Friday, March 9, 2012
The Hunt
I can't think of a better title for this one but this is about my hunt for the church and venue of our coming wedding.
It's official, I'm getting married and I'm an overseas bride - meaning I'm going to prepare my wedding via phonecalls and emails - how easy is that! :-) Good thing, right now, work load is light so I was able to browse the net and source for suppliers (that's two weeks of browsing). I was able to book the church and venue via emails and phonecalls too, and asked my sister to go there personally to pay for the downpayment.
Our wedding is still next year but wedding in manila is a big event and the churches and venues are like hotcakes specially on hot dates. Hot dates are the dates considered lucky by feng shui, superstitious belief and other beliefs. It is advisable to book your church and venue at least a year ahead. Yes, you read it right, a year ahead, that is if you are eyeing the most sought after church or venue on the hot dates.
Picture grabbed from google
Picture grabbed from google
As for me, I have a very limited dates to choose from because I have to consider the availability of my family. And that leaves me only 7 saturdays to choose from. Why saturday? So that our guests can attend the occasion without filing a leave from there work and school.Given that fact, it's harder for me to get a venue because i have a short time constraint. Initially, I want an April 20 wedding date but the future in-laws think it's way too early and requested for a later date. My 2nd choice is May 18th. But since this is a hot date, the venue that I want was already booked for the evening event and I was left with the option to have a morning event. But the con for morning event is the call time is way too early. The ceremony should be at 9am so that you can have the reception from 11- 2pm. With that, you have to wake up around 4am to start with the wedding preparations like Hair and make up and pictorials. So i have to check other dates, and I'm left with april 27. I pencil booked the church and the venue for morning event because the venue rental fee is cheaper for morning event.
3D image of the Orchard Ballroom...I hope this venue will not fail me
When i asked and discussed it again with H, that's when he asked me why get the Pavilion and not the Orchard ballroom since it will be 50k lesser than the pavilion. We have to be practical and we have to save whatever we can save. So, that's when I checked again with the AE the availability of the ballroom and thank goodness, it's still open since this one is new and will have it's first event only this coming May. And that's how I got the church and the venue on the date that I want, May 18, 2013 330pm ceremony and 5pm-9pm reception, and according to our budget also.
Now, the next step is hunting for the other suppliers. But I think the toughest part will be the processing of all legal documents in order to get a marriage license, a pre-requisite in getting married plus all the seminars like family planning and pre-cana seminar. How we are going to do that is still a question because as much as possible I don't want us flying again to manila prior to the wedding to attend all the seminars. It's way too expensive and a hassle also at work. Sometimes I wonder if this are the reasons why there are lots of people in the Philippines who are not getting married in church yet or opt to live together because they don't want to face the hassle of the church requirements.
Aside from my sister who is helping me with all this preparations, I also joined Weddings at work yahoo group. It's a group of all those couples who are in their planning stage of their wedding also. It's in here where I get tips and moral support also. Haaaay... this is just the first leg of my wedding preparations, it's still a long way to go.
One reason why I booked Our Lady of Mt. Carmel and Oasis is because of proximity. Here's the location map:
It's official, I'm getting married and I'm an overseas bride - meaning I'm going to prepare my wedding via phonecalls and emails - how easy is that! :-) Good thing, right now, work load is light so I was able to browse the net and source for suppliers (that's two weeks of browsing). I was able to book the church and venue via emails and phonecalls too, and asked my sister to go there personally to pay for the downpayment.
Our wedding is still next year but wedding in manila is a big event and the churches and venues are like hotcakes specially on hot dates. Hot dates are the dates considered lucky by feng shui, superstitious belief and other beliefs. It is advisable to book your church and venue at least a year ahead. Yes, you read it right, a year ahead, that is if you are eyeing the most sought after church or venue on the hot dates.
As for me, I have a very limited dates to choose from because I have to consider the availability of my family. And that leaves me only 7 saturdays to choose from. Why saturday? So that our guests can attend the occasion without filing a leave from there work and school.Given that fact, it's harder for me to get a venue because i have a short time constraint. Initially, I want an April 20 wedding date but the future in-laws think it's way too early and requested for a later date. My 2nd choice is May 18th. But since this is a hot date, the venue that I want was already booked for the evening event and I was left with the option to have a morning event. But the con for morning event is the call time is way too early. The ceremony should be at 9am so that you can have the reception from 11- 2pm. With that, you have to wake up around 4am to start with the wedding preparations like Hair and make up and pictorials. So i have to check other dates, and I'm left with april 27. I pencil booked the church and the venue for morning event because the venue rental fee is cheaper for morning event.
When i asked and discussed it again with H, that's when he asked me why get the Pavilion and not the Orchard ballroom since it will be 50k lesser than the pavilion. We have to be practical and we have to save whatever we can save. So, that's when I checked again with the AE the availability of the ballroom and thank goodness, it's still open since this one is new and will have it's first event only this coming May. And that's how I got the church and the venue on the date that I want, May 18, 2013 330pm ceremony and 5pm-9pm reception, and according to our budget also.
Now, the next step is hunting for the other suppliers. But I think the toughest part will be the processing of all legal documents in order to get a marriage license, a pre-requisite in getting married plus all the seminars like family planning and pre-cana seminar. How we are going to do that is still a question because as much as possible I don't want us flying again to manila prior to the wedding to attend all the seminars. It's way too expensive and a hassle also at work. Sometimes I wonder if this are the reasons why there are lots of people in the Philippines who are not getting married in church yet or opt to live together because they don't want to face the hassle of the church requirements.
Aside from my sister who is helping me with all this preparations, I also joined Weddings at work yahoo group. It's a group of all those couples who are in their planning stage of their wedding also. It's in here where I get tips and moral support also. Haaaay... this is just the first leg of my wedding preparations, it's still a long way to go.
One reason why I booked Our Lady of Mt. Carmel and Oasis is because of proximity. Here's the location map:
Thursday, March 1, 2012
February 29
Yesterday was February 29, a very special date.
4 years ago, on this date February 29, I went out with a guy for a belated welcome dinner ( I came to Bangladesh on Nov.25, after a month I went home for Christmas Holiday and came back to Dhaka after new years celebration). He promised to treat me and my friend for lunch or dinner but for this dinner, he requested for my presence only. Days before the date, we started exchanging friendly SMS to each other, we became closer thus we decided to go out for dinner, after all, his promise was a month overdue already.
The simple friendly dinner changed both our lives... from that day until now, I'm still happy and in love with H, my chipmunk and goon. And he just proposed to me and asked my parents for my hand in marriage last February 12 :-)
4 years ago, on this date February 29, I went out with a guy for a belated welcome dinner ( I came to Bangladesh on Nov.25, after a month I went home for Christmas Holiday and came back to Dhaka after new years celebration). He promised to treat me and my friend for lunch or dinner but for this dinner, he requested for my presence only. Days before the date, we started exchanging friendly SMS to each other, we became closer thus we decided to go out for dinner, after all, his promise was a month overdue already.
The simple friendly dinner changed both our lives... from that day until now, I'm still happy and in love with H, my chipmunk and goon. And he just proposed to me and asked my parents for my hand in marriage last February 12 :-)
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Random Thoughts
This is it!
Nope, I'm not getting married yet but somehow it feels like that. Though I never had an experience getting married, I think the excitement that I was feeling yesterday and even today maybe similar to what I will feel during my wedding. I'm going home for my vacation and this time, H is coming home with me. It's time for him to meet my family, and luckily it will not be just my immediate family. He will get the chance to meet my aunts, uncles, cousins from both sides because my nephew is celebrating his 1st Birthday. Yes, it's a mini reunion of sort.
I've been dreaming and hoping for this time to come, for him to finally meet my family especially my parents, in person. It's hard to arrange the schedule because 1) my mom, together with my youngest sister lives in the US, 2) his work schedules doesn't allow him to take long leaves and 3) our present situation doesn't allow us. But, God is really good, after years of praying for this time to come, it's finally happening. For me, this is one big development especially from his part.
Looking back, the first time I met H, he was in a relationship and he was very vocal in saying that "he isn't the marrying type and he doesn't want to get married at all, it's not his cup of tea and it's not in his vocabulary". Maybe, that's one reason why his past relationship didn't work out. Who, in her right mind, would want to continue a relationship with a guy who doesn't want to settle down at all, right?
Knowing this fact, that he is not the marrying type while I'm the hopeless romantic who dreams of the most romantic proposals and the most intimate,fun wedding - totally complete opposites not only in that aspect, I still took my chances with him. Maybe I was blind by love or maybe because I accepted that maybe it isn't my faith to be married at all.Or, maybe because I was not that serious with the relationship anyway, thinking that maybe it's just infatuation (haha! at my age!!) or maybe I just want companionship while I'm working here...or maybe I'm not really sure. That time, I was ok with this facts. I was okay with the idea that I'm not going to settle down with this guy, I don't want to settle down here in the first place. But, deep inside me was actually hoping that he will marry me, who would want to spend all her effort and give all her love to someone temporary anyway? Someone told me before, that if you enter into relationship without even wishing of settling down with that person, then you are just looking for fun and fling.And, I always remember that.
Few months into our relationship or I think it's right after our 1st anniversary, out of nowhere, H just whispered to my ear "I want to marry you". I turned my head and looked into his eyes and asked him what he just said. And again, he said the same thing while looking at my eyes, "I want to marry you. I don't want to lose you". Of course, that was not a wedding proposal, it can't be. There was no ring.That time, it was a big development from someone who doesn't believe in marriage, for someone who doesn't want to get married at all. Knowing that he wants to marry me was enough for me, it is until now enough for me. But now, the next question is when? And that question is waiting to be answered, as to when until now i don't know.And I'm dying inside to know when....
Nope, I'm not getting married yet but somehow it feels like that. Though I never had an experience getting married, I think the excitement that I was feeling yesterday and even today maybe similar to what I will feel during my wedding. I'm going home for my vacation and this time, H is coming home with me. It's time for him to meet my family, and luckily it will not be just my immediate family. He will get the chance to meet my aunts, uncles, cousins from both sides because my nephew is celebrating his 1st Birthday. Yes, it's a mini reunion of sort.
I've been dreaming and hoping for this time to come, for him to finally meet my family especially my parents, in person. It's hard to arrange the schedule because 1) my mom, together with my youngest sister lives in the US, 2) his work schedules doesn't allow him to take long leaves and 3) our present situation doesn't allow us. But, God is really good, after years of praying for this time to come, it's finally happening. For me, this is one big development especially from his part.
Looking back, the first time I met H, he was in a relationship and he was very vocal in saying that "he isn't the marrying type and he doesn't want to get married at all, it's not his cup of tea and it's not in his vocabulary". Maybe, that's one reason why his past relationship didn't work out. Who, in her right mind, would want to continue a relationship with a guy who doesn't want to settle down at all, right?
Knowing this fact, that he is not the marrying type while I'm the hopeless romantic who dreams of the most romantic proposals and the most intimate,fun wedding - totally complete opposites not only in that aspect, I still took my chances with him. Maybe I was blind by love or maybe because I accepted that maybe it isn't my faith to be married at all.Or, maybe because I was not that serious with the relationship anyway, thinking that maybe it's just infatuation (haha! at my age!!) or maybe I just want companionship while I'm working here...or maybe I'm not really sure. That time, I was ok with this facts. I was okay with the idea that I'm not going to settle down with this guy, I don't want to settle down here in the first place. But, deep inside me was actually hoping that he will marry me, who would want to spend all her effort and give all her love to someone temporary anyway? Someone told me before, that if you enter into relationship without even wishing of settling down with that person, then you are just looking for fun and fling.And, I always remember that.
Few months into our relationship or I think it's right after our 1st anniversary, out of nowhere, H just whispered to my ear "I want to marry you". I turned my head and looked into his eyes and asked him what he just said. And again, he said the same thing while looking at my eyes, "I want to marry you. I don't want to lose you". Of course, that was not a wedding proposal, it can't be. There was no ring.That time, it was a big development from someone who doesn't believe in marriage, for someone who doesn't want to get married at all. Knowing that he wants to marry me was enough for me, it is until now enough for me. But now, the next question is when? And that question is waiting to be answered, as to when until now i don't know.And I'm dying inside to know when....
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